Get Your Opinion Off Your Car

This is my first post on this blog not transferred over from my soon to be defunct MySpace blog. This isn’t a historic even or anything, I just figured I’d give the first non-MySpace entry its due. So, congratulations little guy, you deserve it.

I have an issue this morning. Well, it’s more an issue from last night that spilled over into this morning. My wife made enchiladas last night. No, my issue is not with the Mexican feast that she lovingly prepared. My issue comes from when I had to travel to our local grocer for a couple of missing ingredients.

I parked next to a 1992 Ford Taurus with an interesting bumper sticker. If it wasn’t at night and my cell phone had a flash on it for the camera, I would have taken a pic to post on here, but this will have to do…

While I don’t have an issue with his sentiment to promote the buying and purchasing of American products, I do have a problem with the tone of the phrase used. Does my owning and driving of a Volkswagen somehow make me less American than this gentleman?

Am I hurting the American worker by driving a car that is made in Wolfsburg rather than Claycomo? Should I buy a German flag magnet and put it on my car? My Dad is German after all. Nah, the Germans would never make something that tacky. However, some American company would probably manufacture it. In China.

I don’t hate my country. I don’t even hate this guy whose bumper sticker offended me. What I hate is the continued assumption that if you aren’t supporting someone’s particular cause in this country then you are somehow against them, and it’s personal. I think some people have watched too many Dirty Harry or Arnold Schwarzenegger flicks.

Let’s break down the message on the sticker itself.

“Get My American Flag…” – so, this guy and anyone else who purchased this mass produced sticker is somehow assuming that the American Flag is his intellectual property or he designed it? Could be. Or does he think that people who own foreign cars are out to actually steal all of his American Flags? Who knows, he could be crazy and actually believe that all the flags in the contiguous 48 states are his.

“…Off Of Your Foreign Car.” – who knows? Maybe I could just be driving my buddy’s Honda to the store quick for a six pack or a magazine. Maybe I have a good ol’ Chevy in my driveway and I’m catching the icy stare from this dude for no reason. “My friend is an asshole anyway,” I’d tell him in order to defend my poor choice in transportation. “He wipes his ass with toilet paper with the Declaration of Independence printed on each square.”

This flowed into this morning because our local sports talk radio station, which I spend about 90% of my time in my car listening to, 810 WHB has a program on Saturday mornings called “Racin’ Boys.” Now, I don’t particularly care for NASCAR or any other form of Americanized racing (man, maybe I do hate this country) but I’ll listen to anything while I’m half asleep on a weekend morning before 9AM.

Someone called in to the show and said that he didn’t have a problem with Toyota’s being in NASCAR. He said the people that do are hypocrites because they probably watch Sunday racing on their Japanese TV’s while they wear their favorite drivers T-shirt, probably purchased at Wal-Mart and manufactured in China.

The guy had a thick Missera (maybe you’d have to live here to get that) accent and used the vocabulary of a 5^th grader, but he made a very valid point. We don’t really live in an American economy any longer when it comes to the purchasing of most products.

We live in a global economy and it’s probably going to stay that way while most people are looking for “Everyday Low Prices.” So, until American auto manufacturers can produce a car that isn’t a complete piece of shit that I can afford and I feel is safe yet mildly sporty at the same time, I’m going to stick to buying Volkswagens.

Just sort of a side note here, have you noticed that the two big foreign car makers are from former World War II Axis powers Japan and Germany? Even most people associate exotic cars (IE Ferrari and Lamborghini) with Italy. Does anyone else find this awfully coincidental? Maybe it's just me.

I make a conscious decision to not shop at places like Wal-Mart. I don’t like it. They don’t pay their employees much, or take care of benefits for the non-management workers that make up 85% of their global staff, and yet they are the richest retailer in the world by leaps and bounds. I won’t buy from a company like that. But mostly it's because a majority of the people that shop there have the IQ of Forest Gump with none of the sunny disposition and life lessons that he had to offer. Not one damn piece of chocolate either.

That is called a personal decision. Well, “that’s not unusual Zach,” you might say. To you and me, probably not. You are literate enough to follow what I’m talking about, so you’re smarter than most people. But a personal decisions to purchase American made cars, or bar soap, or socks should be just that. You shouldn’t have to buy your opinions and put them on your car.

This country is now full of personal opinions on cars. “Stay The Course,” “They Started It, We’ll Finish It,” and my favorite “Support The Troops.” Give me a fucking break, do you really need to put crap like this on your car to prove you’re that much more American than someone who doesn’t? Keep your opinions to yourself, and keep your bumper clean. Your crappy 1987 Ford 150 will thank you for it.